Men who are toxically masculine are generally more easily identified by their actions, speech, and writing than are women who are toxically feminine. That is likely the case because we are more prone to look for such in men that in women.
There is more than one way to be toxically masculine or toxically feminine, but this article only deals with one for each sex. Each example below can be assigned to either sex but is used to highlight the sex that uses the method most often.
One example of being toxically feminine: Deferring publicly to men when the woman either does not necessarily believe it is the right thing to do but does it anyway because they are men, or she does believe that women should defer to men and wastes few opportunities to influence others towards her belief system--most particularly her children. Her words and actions are intelligently premeditated and deliberate. Women who are toxically feminine, are fully aware and fully understand that their words and actions influence others concerning their own toxic belief system. This makes a woman toxically feminine.
One example of being toxically masculine: Rendering women invisible by always referring to mixed crowds or the human race in general as ** "men, his, or him" when they know full well this is not only incorrect but is offensive to many. Men who are toxically masculine offend deliberately in this regard. An author, whose work I generally admire, makes a point of calling all humans "men" ... every single time. Lots of authors do this, as it is generally (wrongly) accepted as Ok to refer to humanity as "man." So, what makes person's references deliberately toxic? His references are deliberate, intelligent, and premeditated. He is amazingly articulate and knows better. But regarding women, he deliberately uses semantics in making the point that he believes men are more important that women, and he wastes no opportunity in semantically rendering women invisible by hiding them under semantic burqas. Many men do this, and this makes a man toxically masculine.
** This author does not subscribe to the toxically feminine habit (even when used by well-meaning men) of referring to all humanity or mixed crowds as "she" or "her." This is an extreme reaction, and though often well-meaning, is not helpful in ending the very real but tragic war between the sexes.
It is possible be feminine or masculine in healthy ways. Men and women are different in so many wonderful ways, but illegitimately prescribing our differences rather than legitimately describing them, is what creates toxic femininity or masculinity.
Jocelyn Andersen: Christian Masculinity
Deconstructing the Danvers Statement - by Jocelyn Andersen (substack.com)
Biblical Autonomy of the Sexes (becauseoftheaggelos.blogspot.com)
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